english jokes

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What did the American scientists do when they found that ball pens did not write in space? They spent considerable resources to develop a pen that could write in any conditions. The Russians? They just switched to using pencils.
#USvsRussia #PenPencil
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What is the difference between bad luck and really bad luck? Bad luck is me falling and twisting my ankle a week before the wedding. Really bad luck is my bride to be breaking her ring finger the day before our wedding.

#Wedding #BadLuck
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What did the shark pack for his picnic?
A peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich.
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“You lost your car?”
“Yes.”
Your name?”

“Car-los”.
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Why were all the dolphins high?
They tried the seaweed.

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Did the painting deserve a prison sentence?
No, the poor guy was framed.

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What do you think of the latest belt? It has a watch on it.
An absolute waist of time.
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Why was the hair stylist always punctual at work?
He knew every shortcut!

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Are all sea creatures generous?
No, some are shellfish.

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A boy asked his dad how much it costs to get married.
Dad replied, “I don’t really know son. I’m still paying.”.

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