doctor jokes

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Child: “Mom, when do we have to go to the dentist.”
Mom: “This afternoon at tooth hurtie!”
#Dentist #Puns
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A man is admitting his wife into the hospital. She is in labour and he is visibly nervous and upset. The nurse asks him, “Her first child?”. He replies, “No! I’m her husband.”.
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A doctor tells a patient that she is obese and needs to address the problem. The patient is in denial and gets angry. She says she will be back after getting a second opinion. The doctor says, “I can give you a second opinion. You are also ugly!”.
#DoctorPatient #SecondOpinion
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OMG

A blonde lady had parents who were both doctors. He father, a cardiologist passed away and on her friend’s advice, she ordered flowers that were to be arranged in the shape of a heart for the funeral. A few months later, her mother passed away too. She ordered flowers without asking her friend for advice. When the guests arrived at the funeral they were all horrified at the decorations. Why?
Answer: Her mother was a gynecologist.
#Blonde #Doctor
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Why did the nurse buy stationery?
To draw blood.

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Nervous Patient: “Doctor are you sure I have jaundice? My friend had a doctor who treated him for jaundice and he died of typhus.”
Doctor: “Please do not worry. When I treat a patient for jaundice, he dies of jaundice!”.

#GoodDoctor
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Patient: “Doctor, I think I need glasses.”
Man: “Yes, you do. This is a library.”

#Glasses #Doctor
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